Wood Pussy (And Other Musings)

I swear this is nowhere near as dirty as it sounds.

Last week we were enjoying a family game night with a round of Junior Scrabble. Since anything worth playing is worth winning, we had to get out the dictionary because Chris was challenging a word that I had played. I could have used the online dictionary to prove to see if the word that I had made up was going to pass muster, but I have a thing for old school Miriam-Webster edition that I have had since middle school.  I just like scanning the pages and seeing what other new and interesting words I stumble across on the wandering path that may or may not lead to my intended destination. 

That is when I saw the heading on page 1,361. That is the magical page that begins with “womanlike” and ends with “wood pussy”. Naturally I had to read the definition so I can immediately begin to insert this into my daily vernacular.

wood pussy n (circa 1899): SKUNK

Quickly forgetting that my son is only eight years old, I read the definition out loud. Naturally, Chris and I laughed as if we were the grade school aged members of the room but Ivan did not even bat an eye. I had barely finished reading the definition before Ivan inquired “So, wait… we’re actually going to the Albino Wood Pussy Music Festival next weekend?”

I have a couple of thoughts on this…

First and foremost, will my Father of the Year trophy be mailed to me or will someone hand deliver it?

Secondly, where in the world did this name come from? If skunks actually bore any resemblance to cats then, maybe it would work? Also, did you know that “polecat” is another feline-related nickname of the skunk? Did you have any idea that skunks were once classified as part of the weasel family before genetic research earned them classification as their own unique group? How about the fact that I am obviously such a nerd that casually stumbling across the word “wood pussy” during a game of Junior Scrabble leads me to research skunks on the Interwebs?

Finally, and most importantly, let us return to the significance of Ivan’s question. Yes, we most definitely are going to the Albino Skunk, Wood Pussy, and Polecat Music Festival this weekend.  At this point, it is as celebrated a date in our household as Thanksgiving, Christmas and our wedding anniversary. 

A quick search of this blog brought to my attention that this will be the fifth Skunk Fest in a row that I have used this forum to tell you about the best music festival in our area. So, after telling you to go see “LiveHumans Making Music”, getting all sorts of excited about “Spring Skunk 2.0” and even offering a “Quick Note From A Cripple” when I was incapacitated from shoulder surgery and pain pills, what more could I possibly tell you about The Albino Skunk Music Festival?

Well, since Zeigler is always adding, building and making Skunk Fest bigger, there are a few things, actually.

For starters, this fall’s Skunk Fest will not just feature The Community Tap serving delicious craft beer from under one little tent. Instead, they are going all out with a full-blown beer garden. Seven breweries will share their love of craft beer under one tent and keep your taste buds entertained for the duration of the three-day performance.

How about a bike ride? This year Zeigler brings you Tour De Skunk. Provided you do not spend too much time at the beer garden Friday night, you might feel good enough to go on one of two Skunk bike rides on Saturday morning. The “short” ride is a 13 miler to Campbell’s covered bridge and the real athletes among you can take the 34 mile trip to the 1820 Poinsett Bridge. Proceeds go to Brown Bird’s Dave Lamb who is battling leukemia. 

I will no doubt contribute to the fundraiser but I will do so from the comfort and safety of the beer garden. Take lots of pictures, folks. We will keep an eye on the kegs.

Finally, the festival is about music. Lake Street Dive and Seven Handle Circus have absolutely owned the Skunk Stage in years past and I am stoked that they will both make their Skunk appearances on Saturday night. That alone makes Saturday the can’t-miss night of the festival. Actually, from the time Tonight’s Noise opens up at 3:15 on Thursday, on through Sons of Bill, Frank Solivan & Dirty Kitchen, Darby Wilcox, The Ragbirds and Lonesome River Band Friday night, the whole festival is just three can’t-miss nights in a row.

I guess this is why we go to Skunk Fest every year. 

Make this weekend about albino skunks, wood pussies, polecats or whatever weird double entendre gets your motor running. As long as that motor runs out to Greer for the “greatest show on dirt”, you will be a happy camper. 

Now for a brief moment of shameless self promotion… hey Anderson, folks – this week’s issue of The Upstate Be will contain an article on Skunk Fest written by yours truly. For more Skunk news and less juvenile skunk nicknames, pick it up and get the whole story of Skunk Fest. 

Can I get a “FEST-A-VUUULLLLL!!!!!!”?

Read More

Decisions, Decisions… Spring Skunk and More

Did you ever wish you could be three places at once? This has been a growing problem for me as there just seems like there is too much to do and just not enough, well, me. In a city with Greenville’s entertainment scene we often have to choose between Option A and Option B (and usually do so with relative ease) but this weekend presents some unusually frustrating options.

Option A – The 2013 Spring Skunk Music Fest, Friday & Saturday, April 12 & 13

I have been going to Skunk Fests on and off for at least six years now and I do not think Chris and I have missed a single one since we got married.  Loyalty and tradition aside, Glynn Zeigler has once again assembled a can’t-miss lineup of artists at the increasingly-famous Skunk Farm.  Skunk Fest continues to evolve from a traditional bluegrass festival into an eclectic mix of bluegrass, folk, jazz and jam bands and every single festival just keeps getting better and better.

This year features veteran Skunk alumni Sol Driven Train and our awesome friend and neighbor Darby Wilcox.  This year Darby kicks things off on Friday with her full band, the Peep Show, and is sure to set an unforgettable tone for the weekend. Not to be one to look forward to the end of things, I am ecstatic about seeing Col. Bruce Hampton on stage Saturday night.  Every band in between is just as enticing as we cannot wait to hear what Lake Street Dive, Hooray for the Riff Raff, and all the rest have to offer.

Read More

Paris Mountain: From State Park to Potential Eyesore

This Looks Like A Great Idea!

Anybody that read our opinion of the food truck debate might have picked up some clues that I am a rabid capitalist. I firmly believe that America became a great nation through innovation, hard work, and entrepreneurial spirit. In general I am a solid supporter of the “let’s build it bigger” mentality that our country has always embraced.

The caveat here is that I also feel that development and certain advancements should have some natural boundaries. I like to think of these boundaries as simple things like “common sense”, “human decency”, and “respect for your neighbors”. This is why I feel that one Greenville resident’s proposal to build a five story condominium project near the top of Paris Mountain is completely absurd. 

Read More

Freakcycle 2013

A year ago we lived in Anderson but I was spending a lot of time wandering around Greenville while my son was down the street getting ed-um-a-cated in first grade.  One day I saw a poster downtown for an event and instantly knew that this was something we had to attend.

The event was Freakcycle and was to be held at The Artistry to raise money for the Greenville Humane Society.  It featured “New York City rock & roll, honky tonk swingers”, “Greenville’s own pickers & grinners”, and “local sideshow & burlesque spectaculars”. It also advertised that your tickets could be purchased at a discount if you arrived on your bicycle. 

At the time I had never heard of The Artistry, did not recognize the names of any bands listed on the poster, and knew for certain that we were not about to pedal ourselves from Anderson to Greenville to save six dollars.  What I did know, however, was that this looked like one heck of a good time and that we needed to check this thing out.  I told Chris about the event, we arranged a babysitter for that particular Saturday evening, and we got ourselves ready for a fun Saturday night in Greenville.

And then we stayed home.

Read More

A Segue...

Our last post was a good damn while ago and that is pretty slack. Here's to more timely blog posts moving forward and something to bridge the gap between the last one and the next one...

The last time we were here we told you about George Throop - the guy who is walking across America. Our next post is about our friend Daniel McCord and his music and movie endeavors. Until time allows us to actually write and post the new story, you should watch the video that follows this short rambling session.  It is filmed by Daniel McCord and is about George Throop. 

See how it all comes together?

Read More

Enjoy the Walk, George Throop

George Throop

What is the most physically and mentally demanding thing you have ever done?

I have hiked 15-plus miles a day on trails that have made me want to curl up and die in the woods and left me sore for almost a week.  I fought a Tough Man contest that despite being only a three round fight was the only physical activity that ever made me vomit from exhaustion at the end of it.  Oddly enough, I was not compelled to get sick after I competed in a Mud Run with a hangover and only an hour of sleep under my belt.  

All of these experiences were valuable in their own way and left me with a sense of satisfaction that I completed them.  However I hold no illusions that I will ever be in world class, Iron Man-type condition.  Sure I still hold on to a dream of one day hiking the Appalachian Trail but I accept that making the leap from dream and reality is quite unrealistic any time soon.  Even more so, I engage in these activities for myself and for nothing more than my own enjoyment and pride. 

Read More

A Guide To Dating On I-85

Well, not exactly.

If I did not see this for myself, I would not believe it actually happened.  Even then I would have written it off as an isolated incident if the story had not been retold to Chris by an unrelated party months later.  Confident in its authenticity, I am prepared to announce that I-85 has a new attraction that you should definitely be aware of (no, not the weird, dirty snow tubing place that never really opened near Exit 35).

The man with the worst approach to meeting women is cruising up and down I-85 and he is looking for you.  By “you” I mean, “attractive blonde that is way out of his league”.  He toes the line between “creepy” and “ridiculous” and we feel compelled to share his desperate approach to finding love.

Read More

Chili Cook-Off Results...

So, we participated in the South Carolina Chili Cook-Off championship last week and I am finally ready to talk about it. It is with great pain and sadness that I have to announce that Chris's most amazing chili did not win the People's Choice Award.

There, I said it.

I am tempted to go on a rant about how the loss was an injustice of epic proportions.  I could also go on for days about how "popular" opinion often overlooks true quality in nearly every aspect the world around us.*  That would be bitter and a tad immature so I will save my sour grapes for some homemade wine and focus on good parts of the story. 

Read More

SC Chili Cook-Off Championship

Life is funny in the way that new discoveries and opportunities often present themselves out of nowhere.  In this case, what started as a simple trip to UPS opened the door to an adventure this Saturday that we are totally stoked about.

A couple of months ago I stopped by our local UPS store to get prices on shipping a bunch of Big Daddy’s hot sauce to us from Texas.  Our intent was to procure enough sauce to sell to our friends and neighbors in order to share an amazing Texas flavor with our Upstate community.  As luck would have it, however, the manager of the store is a hot sauce aficionado and committee member for the SC Chili Cook-Off Championship.  Thirty minutes and a bottle of High On Fire later and he invited us to set up shop at the event in Belton on April 14^th.

Read More

Poop In The Bathtub: A Plumbing Tale

The Camera Ran Home Afraid Of The Roots

Three weeks ago the bubbling of the toilet bowl during my shower let me know that there was a clog in our sewage line… again.  The last time this happened a man with a pipe snake and a video camera cleared the line and showed me the roots creeping into our main drainage line.  I assumed that the roots had grown back and this was nothing another $150 and a determined plumber could fix right up.

Our dice did not roll that way.

Read More

Party For The Pets

Let us be honest - Our pets our disgusting little creatures. They lick themselves in ways that we cannot even imagine. Cats bring small woodland creatures to our door step as if they are trophies and dogs will eat absolutely anything they find that they consider uniquely stinky. Five minutes before I sat down to write this our pit bull was licking bird crap off of our driveway like it was a gourmet meal. This afternoon, I cleaned up shredded cardboard that our mutt stole from the recycling bin to use to decorate our living room. They go out of their way to remind us why we are the owners and they are the pets. 

Yet we love them unconditionally.

Read More

Work, Marriage and Mexican Food

Wednesday started out like any other day that we do not have Ivan with us: we grudgingly scraped ourselves out of bed, complained about having to work for a living and then went and did it anyway. Chris went to the hospital to fulfill her lifelong dream of performing heart scans on fat people and I went to finish a glass job in Greer for an old friend and associate. 

Our work day was as close to “routine” as we have in our scattered, hectic lives… for about fifteen minutes.

Read More

“Cancer Benefit” Is An Oxymoron So Let’s Just Call It A Party

I never had the pleasure of meeting Scott Jenkins.  Worse yet, I only know about cholangiocarcinoma because it took Scott’s life.  Please allow me to apologize for these oversights and share some valuable information with you.

No matter how young, active or health conscious that we are, as humans we are fragile creatures.  At any given moment we can fall victim to a careless mishap or runaway train. In Scott’s world, that train came in the form of one of the rarest forms of cancer our bodies can buy.  One day he was alive and healthy with a wife and family that loved him dearly and the next day he was diagnosed with a terminal illness.  Shortly thereafter he left only memories with the people that loved him the most.

Read More